Day 156 – September 10, 2014

Laundry, more laundry, my life is laundry, both physical (lavable?) and metaphoric. I wash now the dinosaur. Fortunately dinosaur refers here only to the fleece costume as this typing dinosaur much dislikes water.

Last night, I spooled more wire and sorted more boxes. I’m diving into the dark recesses of my storage locker to poke into 2- and 3-year old abandoned projects. I collect, pile, and throw out.

I spent so much money over the years on small electronics, fabric, and stuff. When employed, I spent to justify working and expedite hobbies. If I’m a natural saver – and I have saved tons – most people might spend tons on what? Drinks? Meals? Exercise equipment? Ski holidays?

I’m not sure why I sort, wash, and purge. If I live as simply, cleanly, and precisely as possible, then what? Do I win a medal? Do I float on clouds? Can I make a mess again? I do feel quite good to be so organized, but to an extreme my behavior becomes obsessive compulsive.

I’m moving on soon to the metaphoric sorting, washing, and purging of the rest of my life. I sorted work, put away all my chemicals, and quit the job. I’m likewise critiquing my relationship with Greg. It is too early to write an assessment.

I’m well aware that I may not have again for decades this unstructured time so I’m tackling seemingly intractable problems. I’m fixing the unfixable, untangling the tangled, and washing the barnacled.

I overstated my income by a little on my 2012 tax return due to messy ESPP accounting. I may be owed some hundreds of dollars in back taxes. An amended tax return can only be filed on paper, not electronically, and Turbo Tax can’t help with the filing. When working, I did not have the energy to go after hundreds of dollars. I now heft the shovel and lean into this intricate, dirty work.