Day 305– February 6, 2015

I ask Ruben if he is happy. He replies that he is the best person he has ever been.

It is an admirable goal: be not the best person possible, but the best yet. Of course good, better, best prompt quantification, but I can keep my own score.

I am the best person I have ever been. I’m the most balanced, healthy, open, and creative I have ever been. I’m the closest I have ever been to a comic superhero.

I’m aware too of nagging, intrinsic anxieties: inability to relate to people, trouble with relationships, and loneliness in general. I at least do know from where these traits come. Although I can’t “fix” my anxieties, I have tools to sift, massage, and relax them.

If I’m the best yet, I wonder what next year shall bring, and the year after that. Do I ascend as shining light or dissolve fulfilled into the landscape? I quite enjoy self-improvement.

Are you the best yet?