2016 starts with loss. Over the holidays, several of my possessions were forcibly taken from me.

I returned from the Galapagos to find my bicycle gone from my garage. Although I locked the bike to itself, I did not lock the vehicle to a firm structure like a garage post. I’m guessing someone in the building inadvertently left the garage door open and a passing thief grabbed the first thing in the garage that looked valuable and unattached. With the U-lock on the frame and skewers on the wheels, that bike will be hard to ride or sell.

In my 8 years in San Francisco, I have had three bikes stolen: one from my apartment balcony, one from Folsom Street at midnight, and now one from my apartment garage. I loved that red Cannondale bike – so fast, so light, so very me. It may have had a crack in the frame, brakes that needed replacing, and a derailleur that was starting to slip, but I wanted to ride and love that red bike a little longer. I now lament dumping a lot of money ($1000) into a new bike for fear it too will be inevitably stolen.

I set The Triangles outside club Mighty for their New Year’s Eve party. Jacob suggested wiring my laptop through a roll-down garage door in their loading dock. The club was continuously open 36 hours with my Triangles blinking away. When I returned on Saturday afternoon to take down my lights, I found the club’s garage door wide open and my computer gone. The club management was shockingly unsympathetic to the loss of my equipment. Rob helpfully showed me how to lock my computer remotely when it is next connected to the internet – it still has not been connected. Sure, the 2008 laptop could no longer hold a battery charge and it struggled to download large internet pages, but it ran LED software and held up well over the years.

The thieves that took my bicycle left my bike helmet behind as helmets are not worth taking. One recent Saturday night outside The Stud bar, I returned to my bike to find my helmet stolen. Its paint was fading and the style was outdated, but the helmet fit my head well.

Last weekend, I had a difficult discussion with Greg. He’s dating someone new and no longer wants to focus on our interactions. It’s the first time he’s walked away as I’m usually the one who runs. Our 5.5 years of turmoil, heartbreak, adventures, and growth are finally over, over-over. I’m angry, sad, lonely, and lost. We clashed on communication styles, miscues, and repeated breakups, but he was my special someone to teach me how to love and be loved.

The world abruptly forces me to shed possessions. Want not. I’m feeling cheated and empty, broke and broken. Now I’m rebuilding. I bought a new bike, wait for the rollout of Apple’s new laptops, and purchased another bike helmet. I sent Greg explanations, grievances, and intentions for closure. However, unlike with a bike, it’s not so easy to purchase another partner. This has been a tough January.